T-Shirt Slogan: “Cute is NOT a dirty word.”

Combine this with a too-cute-for-words picture of a kitten. Offer it on either a black or powder-pink background. And make sure to sell sizes for infants as well as adults.

The John Cage Portable Music Player

It's got two earbuds with holes in them, so that you can hear everything going on around you. I don't know if it needs to play any other music.

Musical Shredder

Just a novelty item, a musical shredder. Plays a tune as you shred your documents. If you were to build in songs, obvious choices include Queen's "Another One Bites the Dust" and Dick Dale's "Misirlou." Alternatively, you could drop in a little MP3 player with a CF slot or similar.

Not only would it add a little bit of fun to shredding documents, it would also help to cover the hideous whining noise that most shredders make.