Extreme Sushi
My friend Sam, who is now honeymooning in Asia with his lovely wife Amy, was telling me of his idea for "Extreme Sushi."
It's not just eat what you kill, and it's not just being on a boat with a bunch of other sweaty other fishermen / spearfishermen, though that's part of it, with a high-class sushi chef on board and everything...
Sam proposes adding a bathysphere, or possibly remote-controlled submarines, and spearfishing all kinds of deep-sea creatures rarely eaten.
Are they endangered? Are they toxic? Are they tasty? There's only one way to find out...
Whitesploitation
A hitherto unrecognized and underappreciated movie genre. Sure, Deliverance and John Waters films have been its forerunners, but there's more to do.
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Droids
In this great post, a blogger's child asks the question, "So, does this mean that R2-D2 is really the main character in Star Wars?"
This reminded me of a thought I had while seeing Revenge of the Sith, which I generally despised. I recalled hearing the rumor that Tom Stoppard, author of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead among other works, gave an uncredited hand to George Lucas with the new Star Wars trilogy. True or not, I wondered what Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead would be like if it had been set in the Star Wars universe.
And then I realized that it had already been done: Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy could be read in this way simply by substituting C3P0 with Arthur Dent.
So, kid, it's clear that C3P0 is the main character in Star Wars, not R2D2. Sorry.
Sp0rts Bars in Women’s Clothing Stores
Put a sports bar in a department store, near the women's dressing rooms. Women can come into the bar and ask their husbands if the outfit looks okay, and the men can let them know, and get back to watching the game. It's a stereotype, sure, but it would serve a real need too.
First Impressions
Another reality TV show idea: Take a room full of people of all different backgrounds and appearances. They pair off, choosing their partners in the first episode. The series follows them as these couples live together for six months. If a couple cites irreconcilable differences, they "break up" and disappear from the show. At the end of the season, a fixed pool of prize money is divided by the number of successful couples. This gives motivation for people to try to get between other couples. It could be fun and vicious to watch.
Guy Smiley to replace Peter Jennings
Now that Disney owns not only ABC but The Muppets too, it seems only common sense for them to leverage their properties . News as entertainment is already the focus of the business, so why not take that to the next level? In addition to anchorman Guy Smiley, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew could be the science correspondent, Janice could be the entertainment person. Statler and Waldorf could do commentary, and Fozzie Bear might do human interest stories. Miss Piggy is a clear choice for the fashion beat, and Sam the Eagle could be political correspondent.
They're puppets? They don't know anything? Their opinions are scripted by handlers and advertisers? Would that really be any worse than the current TV news?
“New York Apartment Porn” Film Festival
When Melinda and Melinda came out, several reviews mentioned the unrealistically gorgeous New York apartments occupied by the young characters in the film, usually with more than a hint of lust.
A film festival that catered to ooohs and aaaahs over sexy airbrushed real estate could be a lot of fun. "Ooooh, look at the architectural detail!" "Yes, I've always wanted a pre-war Brownstone with marble floors..."
Pam Grier ‘Che’ Shirt
I want one of those 'Che' shirts, but with Pam Grier on it, instead of Che. I think it would look totally badass.
Yeah, I took last week off. And I'll be taking the first week in May off too, when I'm in Chicago. And I may take a week or so off when I'm in Santa Fe near the end of May...
Vegas Casino Idea 2
A Russian Communism-themed casino, "Red Square." Statues of Lenin, Stalin, etc. Lots of tall fur hats and Soviet kitsch. Hey, even the long line for the buffet is part of the theme...
Vegas Casino Idea 1
An "Alien Crash" casino. Looks like a flying saucer landed edge-first on the Vegas strip. Right into another hotel. Or two, even.
This gives you the ability to have different styles in the different wings: a lower-echelon hotel on one side, a higher-echelon hotel on the other, and in between, a "sideways" alien hotel, decorated with signs in alien languages. Floors can be numbered in vertical stripes, which might be confusing at first, but would add substantially to the theme.
Drink colors, costumes, etc., are an exercise left to the reader. Though it would be nice to have some Star Trek-like "green girls" on the casino floor...
Five Things Men Love From Boyhood
In childhood, boys are taught to love five things.
Many adult men, when confronted with any or all of these five things, might even prefer them to sex.
In no particular order, they are dinosaurs, airplanes, pirates, lasers, and spaceships.
This New York Times article about the possibility of cloning dinosaurs from soft tissue embedded in fossils offers a near ideal demonstration:
Where the professionals urge caution, Ryan's concerns were far more elaborate, and perhaps that is only logical. After all, when the scientists speak of the distant future, Ryan and his colleagues will be middle-aged. They will have to face the possible consequences, such as the necessity of attacking cloned dinosaurs with fighter jets.
The only better illustration would be to be a space pirate who steals a spaceship, which turns into an airplane, so that he can shoot dinosaurs with lasers and save the world.
Adult men would want to add, say, a redhead at the end of that sequence, but many will admit that's gilding the lily.